Do I Have to Tell My Partner I Want an Abortion?

If you’re pregnant, you’re not legally obligated to tell your partner or anyone else that you want to get an abortion. However, there are some things to ask yourself before you make this decision. 

Why Don’t I Want to Tell My Partner?

Keeping the news of pregnancy from your partner and getting an abortion without them knowing might seem like an easier route to making it all go away. However, it’s important to consider why you don’t want to tell them.

Are you worried that your partner will try to talk you out of having an abortion? If so, getting an abortion without their knowledge is a big secret to keep inside. If you and your partner plan to stay together, the weight of keeping this secret will be a heavy burden to bear for years to come. And even if you’re not sure whether you’ll stay together, if your partner wouldn’t want you to have an abortion, they may offer to help support you if you choose to instead parent.

Are you afraid for your safety if you tell your partner you want an abortion? If so, any anger that makes you feel unsafe is a sign of an abusive relationship. Talking to a trusted friend or relative about your situation with your partner is essential for ensuring your safety—no matter what you choose to do with your pregnancy. If you feel that you’re in immediate danger, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is always available and can provide guidance. 

Have I Considered All My Options? 

Abortion is a permanent, life-changing decision, which is why it’s vital to think through all of your options before making this choice. 

If you trust your partner, they can be a good person to talk to about your next steps in the pregnancy. Since you haven’t told them yet, the anxiety, worry, and stress of the pregnancy are all on your shoulders. However, if you tell your partner, they can help take on some of that burden. 

While you only have three options for moving forward—abortion, parenting, or adoption—you might be surprised that your partner is more supportive than you initially thought they’d be. Or maybe they can help you see scenarios and outcomes you hadn’t thought of before. 

Next Steps 

Only you can make the choice about what to do next in your pregnancy. However, whether or not you choose to tell your partner, you’re not alone. At Assure Women’s Center, we offer free pregnancy resources and information that can help you make an informed decision. Contact us today to schedule a free, confidential appointment in a caring, non-judgmental space. 


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